Oslo, Norway – April 1, 2007
Opera Software ASA, makers of the best browser in this, or indeed any, universe, today revealed the results of a five month process to determine this year’s April Fool’s joke. After considerable competitive analysis, structural synthesis, skilled observation, educated prognostication and blind luck, the management along with Opera’s Corporate Relations and Prevarication department determined there will be no April Fool’s joke for FY07.
“It became too much,” said a frustrated Torgrim Odland, director Opera’s Corporate Relations and Prevarication department. “First it was the obviously fake SoundWave digital voice P2P technology and then we turned our employees into models. I cannot imagine what tomfoolery would be next: are we hiring penguins as Linux developers? Perhaps we”ll have our CEO go skydiving dressed as a nun. I didn’t see where this would ever end, so I ended it.”
Worldwide, corporations embracing April Fool’s Day as their only official excuse to have a bit of fun skyrocketed 6000% in 2006, somewhat muting the overall enjoyment of the day, according to a reputable firm whose research, Opera’s promises, was in no way paid for by Mr. Odland or anyone connected to Opera Software ASA and certainly not used to sway executive decision on this matter.
“It’s not often I get to break out of my shell, let alone my basement,” said Olafur ‘Olli” Arnason, QA Manager for Opera’s Desktop browser. “I really wanted to laugh at a silly press release and pass some scandalous pictures around, but now the suits have ruined it. I guess I”ll just spend my Sunday in Second Life with everyone else I know.”